Today I am writing you in regards to my terrible parenting skills. I am seeking your advice and help seeing how I am clearly NOT capable of raising my children the right way.
Please don't count in the facts that I am currently a little slow on my feet seeing how I'm a 200lbs cow who is awaiting the arrival of her third child in 28 days, a "single mom" with a husband abroad serving his country. I am truly sorry that I am currently not able to run a marathon due to this baby putting all this weight on my cervix that it's hard to walk from the couch to the potty and back. I know it's a disgusting sight and I am trying my best to make my children's lived less miserable and giving them every second of stored energy rather than resting.
I don't know if you can somehow relate to how it is without a husband in the service and two children that don't know how to deal with daddy being gone so they start going cookoo. The constant fighting and screaming in this house clearly is because of my lack of parenting skills and keeping them busy 24/7. Be advised when I say "constant" I mean AT ALL TIMES POSSIBLE. I'm not sure what's worse, the fighting and screaming that doesn't involve me - well not until the try to beat each other in who can run faster to mommy to tell on the other - or, how easy it is for them to completely ignore everything I say.
Don't mind that it's been rough on me that family really isn't what it's intended seeing how I have absolutely NO support here whatsoever. Yes they're far away, but there isn't even such thing as morale support coming from the ones that brought me into this world and the ones that grew up under the same roof as I did.
I guess between all of this and paying bills, cleaning the house, setting up for the new baby, planning summer activities for the kids, cooking, laundry, the family pets, doctors visits, ER visits, the dentist, playdates, fundraisers, volunteer work, teaching things from learning how to write your name, potty training, meaning of holidays and answering any possible question they could have, I must have lost my ability to be a good mom because today I dared to let them play in the backyard with me just sitting in a chair and looking up in the sky TRYING to find a moment to rest. Prior to that I filled up their new kiddy pool with about two inches of water and reminded them of a few rules: don't touch my plants, don't throw anything in that pool, look out for spiders and snakes.
15 minutes later I decide it's time to go inside seeing how my daughter thought it'd be oh so funny so hose down my windows with the garden hose and her brother was yelling at the top of his lungs for her to stop and "counting" like he's her dad, which well, he isn't. So on our way inside I look at the KIDDY pool and oh how prettyful, the water was covered with flowers. Of course there was no answer to my question to why such flowers were in there. Four big eyes and open mouths definitely was all I could expect.
And then to top it all off, I had the nerve to post a very sarcastic status about the flower-pool incident just to be put in my place an reminded what a shitty parent I must be for leaving my unsupervised and obviously too young (or else they'd listen) children outside with a pool they can drown in.
I'm sorry Supermom.
I don't know where I went wrong and why my children simply act like children act, well unless they're so terrified of their parents that they even ask permission to breathe. I don't know why they can't follow every single instruction given, must be a disease because when I was still working as a child and youth program assistant for the united states army, I saw quite a LOT of that and I was always surprised how un-adult-like these kids behaved even though they are meant to listen to each command after hearing it for the first time. My children must suffer from the same horrible virus.
I know my jealousy of your perfect picked fence life with a husband who works 9 to 5 and gets the weekends off, your parents and inlaws living in the same zipcode and your perfect little todds, is downright disgusting and uncalled for, I know.
BUT:
Honestly, i REALLY don't give a shit what you have to say about my oh so poor parenting skills. I've been doing this for more than 8 years and by no means am I perfect, bun unless you have walked as little as a mile in MY shoes, and know the whole story, don't effin judge me as for I don't need your ignorance to mess with my good mood.
Thanks for your time, Supermom. I'm looking forward to your response. NOT.
