First of all, and this one is hitting close to home right now, why do people feel the need to use alcohol and its consumption as a replacement for whatever is missing in their life? When you're young you just don't know any better, teens try it at an early age because that's what they see on TV. I am one of those people who truly believes it is or fault our youth is way deep into drugs and alcohol, violence and teen pregnancies. We let them be around it, WE are the ones introducing it to them, so really, you can't blame your child when they start smoking at 14, end up pregnant at 16 with an alcohol and drug addiction. Where were you as a parent teaching them right from wrong? Where were you monitoring what your child was watching on tv, what computer games they were playing, what friends they were hanging out with? Sure, you can't be there all the time, but I'm sorry, if you end up with a teenager with these kind of issues it's not because you "couldn't be there all the time" it's because you failed your children as a parent.
Back to the alcohol issue. Like I said when you're young you don't know any better, it's legal (once you hit a certain age of course, where I'm from 16 for beer and wine, 18 for everything else) everyone else does it so you do it, I get it. I've done it, too. I'd get drunk at the weekends with my friends at the clubs and had a kick ass time. And still nice today to have a little bit to drink when you're out and just wanna "let losse". Me personally, I get that chance maybe twice a year, if that, and well right now that's totally out of the question seeing how I'm almost 8 months pregnant. And no, I DON'T believe that "a glass of wine a day" won't hurt your unborn child. If a glass of wine will make me tipsy, i don't even want to know what it'll do to my unborn child. Everyone thinking it is ok to drink while pregnant, deserves to be slapped upside the head, but that's just my opinion.
So when does drinking become an issue? When do you as the person consuming enormous amounts of alcohol on a regular basis realize, it's too much and has become a problem? How do you get yourself out of it! I think society needs to get away from the image of the heavy alcoholic who is drunk 24/7. It's starts way before that. But society tends to look away because who enjoys pointing fingers at someone saying "you are an alcoholic". I believe once you consider alcohol as a fix-all, a replacement, a way to cope, that's when you're already in way too deep. But it's hard to reach a person who's considering alcohol "a friend". You had a shitty day at work again, so you get drunk. You had a fight with your spouse, so you get drunk. You are over whelmed with whatever situation you're in, so you get drunk. And again and again.
What does that fix? Nothing. It only makes things worse. And sadly, in most cases, you won't realize that until it's too late. Alcoholism is a disease. But since society makes us believe it's "normal" it's "accepted" to drink even at noon, you don't see yourself as being sick. Yet you are.
The most devastating part is not just that you're hurting yourself by slowly destroying yourself and body, you are hurting the ones that love you and are there to help you but you won't reach out because alcohol doesn't want you to talk, it doesn't want you to open up and deal with your issues. No. Alcohol is the backstabbing bitch that'll always smile in your face telling you lies how you'll always have your buddy alcohol but in the end, when it's all said and done, when it's too late, alcohol will have taken everything from you.
You don't just damage yourself, you damage the ones who care about you. So what are they to do? Sit around and watch you go down hill? Are they to interfere? Should they protect themselves? Could you blame them for walking out on you after they've tried absolutely everything to save you from yourself when they almost got lost themselves along the way? And yes you don't see that because the disease has taken over your body AND mind. You're not gonna see any of that until, yes, until it is too late.
I, like many people I know, grew up with alcoholics around them. And it's not pretty to watch, especially not when you're a child. It's painful to watch them hurt other with their actions and words all because they had one too many at the bar. When alcohol becomes a priority and your family comes second, you're crossing a line.
You're not as strong as you seem. You're weak. Hiding behind your drunk facade isn't making you look tough. Hiding from whatever it is you don't want to deal with, no it doesn't make you appear tough at all.
Get help. Offer help. Let them help you. Get better!
What'd you do if another woman were to kiss your husband and he'd tell you about it? I just read that in an army wives support group. And shockingly, out of god knows how many ppl answering there was only ONE that said, she'd be glad he told her but she'd walk away from "her" with class. Everyone else said they'd "beat the shit out of that bitch". What exactly DID happen to classy women? Where have the gone to?
Not only is it extremely low class to "beat the shit" out of someone, but shouldn't you also ask yourself how your significant other even got into that kind of situation? As much as they wanna play the victim, ask yourself, are they really THAT innocent?
And last but not least (at least for now) I HATE it when so called "friends" choose sides when there's an argument in the room and they don't even bother to actually be that friend they should be and hear both sides to the story. Yes NEWSFLASH, there's ALWAYS two sides to EVERY story!
Especially when it comes to relationship issues you are better off shutting the hell up rather than fueling the fire by telling the other party exactly what they want to hear even though they know it's wrong. That they're wrong. They've screwed up and they know it. But maybe you being a screw up yourself, is what makes you jump on the band wagon. Some "friends" you think you can rely on are poison to your life without you even knowing it. Sure we all get advice when we don't know what to do. But I believe the most honest and worthy advice anyone could ever give you is that whatever they'll tell you, they're gonna lose either way and YOU need to figure out for yourself what you think you should do. Not the "OMG is she on her period?", "ah women, they're all the same, let her get over it" or "how dare she! Who does she think she is? She isn't your mother, she can't tell you what to do!" crap, a REAL friend wouldn't say something like that. And I hate to break it to you, but, biotch, I may not be his mother, but I am his WIFE, the mother of his children. So yes, I do own that right that I can tell him what to do and what not to do if it puts him or his family at any kind of risk!
Yes, I occasionally argue with my husband and even fight, we're only human. But let me just make one thing crystal clear to YOU! Just because I've been sitting here quietly all this time, doesn't mean I don't see through you. Just because I smile and let you be part of my life, doesn't mean I respect you. Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer...
That's it for now. Have a lovely tuesday :O)
Peace out
